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Alas! A cornucopia of preschool romance! - Badfic: The Daily Spork [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Badfic: The Daily Spork

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Alas! A cornucopia of preschool romance! [Nov. 25th, 2005|05:44 pm]
Badfic: The Daily Spork


Title: The Patron of the Opera
CulpritAuthor: mrsgerrybutler13 This tells us something...
Fandom: The Phantom of the Opera
Spelling and Grammar: Decent. It’s the plot that gets me.
Notes: What I don’t understand is how a seven year old would be madly stricken with love? Sure, “Be my girlfriend, Mary Sue!”, but not, ‘I have wanted to marry you since I was five.”
Verdict: 3/4 - Awful

It was 9:30 at night when they arrived to the Changy estate. Gustave Daae, as usual, was to play festive songs on the violin. It was a happy celebration, Philippe was getting married and he had become the true Count that night. His father would just be a regular person but would be in the history books, for sure! But if he was just a regular person, he wouldn’t be in the history books...
Christine, daughter of the famous violinist, always would come to help entertain “Entertain”? Hmmm... the new Viscount, Raoul. They were both seven and enjoyed many like things.
When they walked in, Raoul sat contently in a corner of the grand ballroom, waiting for Christine's arrival. When he saw Christine, his jaw literally dropped. She was in a simple yet, exquisite ball gown and her curly hair tied up with a white ribbon. Yes, because seven-year-old girls are just so sexy. Her father escorted her to the young Raoul and whispered something in his ear.
"Take care of her," and patted him on the shoulder as he walked off. Raoul nodded to himself. He felt special, Because Raoul IS a special person. as if he was protecting her from the drunken guest. *sigh*
Once Gustave had finished the first song, dedicated to the newlyweds, he started another slow song.
"Christine, would you like to dance with me?" He had pleading eyes that he knew she couldn't resist. He had hoped to get his first dance tonight with the girl of his dreams. For God’s sake, they’re seven year olds!
"Um...If...If I must," a hint of sarcasm in her voice. I’m still trying to figure out how to say that line with a “hint of sarcasm” in my voice. He grabbed her arm and they ran towards the adults.
The 'couple' jumped right onto the floor. They looked around to see how to hold each other. Once they familiarized themselves with the proper technique, they joined the adults dancing.
The party guest's were shocked to see the young pair together dancing. They quickly stepped out of the way and whispered among themselves. Oh yes, because two SEVEN YEAR-OLDS dancing is just absolutely SCANDALOUS! OMG!!!1!!
When the song finally ended, the two received a large applause. Raoul bowed, Christine curtsied, and then they ran up into his room.
"That was rather exciting," she managed to say in between breaths.
"I agree," Raoul had anxiously awaited until they could be alone. He loved her so much. He vowed to himself that he would never lose her. EVER! Like, EVAH!
"Christine, I must ask you something," Raoul was very nervous for her response. 'Would she let me?'
"Anything," Christine replied reassuringly. Raoul didn't say anything for a while. Well, it was actually only a few seconds that was stretched by nerves. Anyway, after a few seconds, Raoul dove strait into a kiss. *chokes on cereal* Why? Why?
"EW! Why did you do that?" she exaggerated and wiped her lips off as if there were cooties spreading all over them. Oh. Mah. Gawd. I, like, have cooties now!! OMG!!!! EEEWWWW!!
"I love you." Raoul was, at this point, shocked at how her response was so negative. Gee, I wonder why.
"I...I'm...I'm sorry," she looked down at the floor. "...but I don't love you," OOOHH! DENIED!! and at the sound of that, his heart shattered into a million pieces. “You see Raoul, I’ve always had a crush on this kid named Erik...”
He had always loved Christine. When he first saw her, helplessly trying to catch her scarf that was blown out to sea. He jumped into the fridged water and rescued it before it sunk to the bottom. She had such a big smile when upon her face and that is when he found his future bride. When he was five or six? BE REALISTIC.
Christine snuck out of the room but was quickly escorted by her long-time friend. She went to her father, who had just stopped playing his violin.
"... but the ballet was astonishing! I think Christine would enjoy it very much, Gustave," She looked down at the little girl who had just appeared. "Would you like that?" The question directed to Christine. "They have a wonderful program at the Opera Populaire..." and that was all both needed to hear.
"Father, I have always wanted to sing. Please..." He could never say no to those pleading eyes. She was a spinning image of her mother and he had always wanted her to pursue her dreams. A spinning image???
"I think it's a wonderful idea. I need a permanent job and I think they would happily accept me into the orchestra. We leave first thing tomorrow. If you'll excuse us, we need to leave." Raoul was listening to he conversation through the stairs. She was leaving for good. He ran up to his room in tears. That’s right, little fop. Go cry to your mommy.
Gustave took Christine by the hand and led her into the carriage. She glanced back at the manor one last time. She swore that she saw Raoul upstairs in his room, looking out his window. He was waving good-bye and he blew her a kiss. She acted as she caught and she never unclenched her fist that night. Again, the idea of seven year-old romance is ridiculous.

The following day, Gustave and his daughter set out to Paris and the Opera Populaire. Christine could hardly wait. She wanted to become a ballerina for so long and had always sung simple tunes but now, she could sing with a chorus. Both dreams were quickly unfolding to become a reality.
Gustave, on the other hand, was having difficulties allowing this to happen. He had heard multiple rumors of a so-called opera ghost and was worried about Christine finding him. Of course, for he doesn’t want strange men singing to her through mirrors. He was glad that he could work with his daughter and have a close bond although they had a strong relationship to begin with. And the most Nonsensical Sentence Award goes to...

What seemed like a lifetime to arrive to the opera house were only a few hours.
Christine jumped out and saw a lot of people starring at her and her father. They went inside to fill out the paper work and in a few short agreements and signatures; they were official members of the Opera Populaire. Monsieur Lefreve announced that they had joined and were greeted with welcome arms. They were the center of attention that day.
Gustave was handed a large folder of complicated music. He had a lot of practice ahead of him tonight.
The ballet mistress, Mme. Giry, to retrive a pair of ballet slippers and a costume, escorted Christine. Once they returned, a small child walked up to Christine.
"Bon jour! I'm Meg Giry. You're Christine Daae. It's a pleasure to meet you!" Meg was overwhelmed to meet a well-known person.
"It's wonderful to meet you, too. Would you mind teaching me the moves?" Oh yes, break dance for us, Meg. Show us the moves. Christine looked at the older ballerina's and Meg laughed.
"We aren't dancing in this! I just started along with the other younger girls. The art of ballet is an extremely difficult one and will take years to learn. That's what my mother always say to me," and she gestured to Mme. Giry.
That day had been gulling for the father and daughter. He did meet the ballet instructor and asked about voice lessons. She denied him and said that it is only available to older students. Christine had learned more that most of the steps that day and then some extra's. She stayed after class and Mme. Giry taught her advanced moves. At this rate, she would be dancing in the opera's within the month. But she just got there and she’s already doing advanced “moves” that evening?? WTF?
Monsieur Lefreve gave them a quick tour of the house. The chapel, the backstage area, and their rooms. They were right next to each other, which was a good thing for Christine’s father. Safety was a biggie.
His room was small and humble. Filled with a bed, a music stand, a desk and chair, and a wall mirror. Nothing fancy but homey enough to get comfortable to.
Christine's room was far from that. She was living in luxury. She had a huge, canopy topped bed, an armoire, a full sized mirror (insert POTO theme here), and a vanity. SHE IS SEVEN FREAKIN’ YEARS OLD. SHE JUST GOT THERE. SHE KNOWS VERY, VERY LITTLE ABOUT BALLET. WHY THE HELL DOES SHE GET A SUITE AND DADDY GETS THE HOLE IN THE WALL??????????? Honestly, do some people ever THINK!!?!?!?!?! She had it made.

[User Picture]From: ellen_mirai
2005-11-26 04:07 am (UTC)
*insert sound of banging head repeatedly on computer desk here*
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[User Picture]From: diana_lucifera
2005-11-27 03:25 am (UTC)
Wow. That was... wow. I want to find the seven year-old who acts like this.

Oh yes, break dance for us, Meg. Show us the moves.

Hahahaha! *snort*

(insert POTO theme here)

OMFG, you loose at LIFE!
(Reply) (Thread)
[User Picture]From: kitty_velvet
2008-08-04 03:51 pm (UTC)
wow. *eyes burst into flame*
(Reply) (Thread)